a change will do you good...

BEFORE & AFTER




she said "go crazy. do anything you want." who was that girl?

appointments and soup!

"curves ahead". no freakin' kidding! doc update! try to slowly reintroduce dairy and no gluten ever again so help you god. done! check back in a month. good. I felt good with my visit. we chatted at length about my fears, worries and never ending internet medical studies. he giggled and kept asking where I read that? duh! on the internet! it was a great visit and I feel refreshed in knowing that he is with me and wants to keep watch over me to see how I am doing. yay!

in my sheer delight I decided to celebrate and make soup! woo hoo! love this recipe. haven't made it in ions, but makes a ton and so now I can have gluten free soup on hand. file under freezes well.

Northern Vegetable Soup

2 tbsp. olive oil
2 tbsp. butter (I used gluten free, dairy free)
1 large onion, chopped
1 clove garlic, minced
1/2 cup chopped celery
1/2 cup chopped carrots
1/2 cup chopped green pepper
2 tbsp. parsley
1 tsp. dried basil
salt & pepper
1 can (19 oz.) tomatoes
2 tbsp. tomato paste
1 can (10 oz) beef broth
3 cups of water
1/2 cup macaroni shells (I used gluten free rotini)
1 can kidney beans
2 cups shredded cabbage

in a large pot heat oil and butter. add onion, garlic, celery, carrots and green pepper. saute for about 5 minutes. add parsely, basil and salt and pepper. stir in tomatoes, tomato paste, broth and water. bring to a boil, reduce heat, cover and simmer about 10 minutes. add macaroni, cover and cook till tender. add beans and cabbage. cover and simmer about 30 minutes. add extra water if needed. (I always add extra water)

enjoy!

surprise!

more good things or thing...



awesome "art tuesday" with my girl. were we super productive? depends on how you define that. with our art? sort of...with our catching up chit chat? tons!

we did the usual calendar set up for the month and threw around some ideas about what we want to accomplish in the next month. great day!

we won't mention that the car had a boo boo cause now it is fixed! so - OVER THAT!

read something tonight that was very interesting and confusing all at the same time. It talks about how goal setting is about trying to achieve something in the future that we don't have. okay! it's about wanting more or less of what we have in our present life. uh, yeah! when we reach our goal we never really arrive. hmmmm...

we are always in a state of becoming. yup! we go from goal to goal and keep going round kind of like a hamster on the wheel. no matter how fast we peddle our feet we never really go anywhere. we may think we are moving and making progress, but ultimately we will not have inner peace until we get off the wheel. okay? the way to get off the wheel is to no longer want something that is different than what exists in the present moment. huh?

I read this in the latest issue of synchronicity. it goes on and there is more that I am reading over and over as if that will help me decipher its meaning. I mean, think about it. could you accept yourself and your life as it is? have we not been taught to have goals, become better and be the best that we can be? in all that we say and do?

I laughed at one point actually agreeing with the hamster analogy. I have my "to-do" lists that I make in an effort to reach my "goals" of getting things done, crossed off, completed and it seems like the list is never ending. I have goals that I complete and then set new goals and so on and so on. are they really complete though? I mean, yes I ran a marathon, but I could run it faster! so that is totally a hamster on a wheel! I cleaned the bathroom this week and check it off the list, but, oh look, it's on the list again for next week! I completed my 31 days of yoga and now what? I could do 62 days of yoga! wth?

it is all so confusing and somewhat tiring to think about goals and accomplishing them or not accomplishing them. goals generally take some work to accomplish and y' all know that "work" in my books is highly overrated. I like to "PLAY"! lately I try to remind myself to enjoy the moment. enjoy the process. enjoy it as it is. then that little hamster in me jumps on the friggin' wheel and runs as fast as she can to try to get it all done. and then what? it is never ALL DONE!

just something to think about...

what I know fo sho? life IS good! LIVE!

good things....

gluten free, dairy free muffin mix with a few additions. grated carrot, crushed pineapple, coconut and walnuts. yum!

blackberries, strawberries, blueberries & nectarines for a scrumptious fruit salad!

and last but not least a big huge bowl of greens, celery, carrots & pea pods all ready for lunch. just add hard boiled eggs, ham & turkey and ya got chef salad. or add some tuna and soy nuts, or some grilled chicken breast. top any or all of these off with olive oil and balsamic vinegar and you are done!

I feel so friggin' organized this week I scare myself! BOO! (that's next month folks!)

today is the first official art day of the fall season...let's see what creative messes we can make!

happy september!

my new year starts today! well, check back with me in a couple of days and that may change. anyway so here are some things that are making me uber happy right now:

I ordered this and this. I am ready to embrace the new diet and stop complaining. well, check back with me in a couple of days and that may change.

I was super excited about this and waiting for it to go live. mine is the last pic with a link to see the whole thing. what a thrill!

he has decided to run his marathon come hell or high water before the end of the year and so we are off to vegas baby! funny thing is that last year when I ran my first marathon he did the half and cheered me on at the finish line. this year he will be running his first marathon and I will do the half (yes you read that correctly!) and be there to congratulate him at the finish line. kewl...

saw these the other day and wanted to buy all of them! love the words. so true!

love this and this on the right and tried these on.

played with this for a bit. total adhd procrastination. some days ya just gotta throw the "to-do's" aside and do the "to-want's".

one thing that makes me super happy today is that I completed my "yoga warrior" challenge. I wanted to participate in this at the local yoga studio, but didn't think I could make the early classes and what would I do if I was out of town? instead I did the yoga routine from this for 31 days straight! I officially am now a "yoga warrior"! yay me! I do it first thing in the morning and it has helped me to slow down. some days I would get up and be exhausted before I even started thinking about what I had to accomplish. now I start the day relaxed, refreshed and with new eyes. my body feels better too. muscles stretched out daily and body feels toned. I plan to continue this and perhaps spice it up with some different yoga videos.

what is making you happy right now?

whassup?

update on "sparky" the wonder dog. blood test came back clear and we are now trying a round of antibiotics and digestive meds. after this back for another blood test. if they figure out why his hips are so wide I may ask my doctor for the same test! HA!

and then we have this little gem:



my one and only baby...turned eighteen yesterday! yikes! seems like just yesterday that I was holding him in my arms for the first time. he didn't cry while I held him. he just looked at me with this "wth mamma" look and I looked at him with the "wth kid" look. he looked as scared as I felt. I became responsible for his life. he became my reason for living. I changed from that moment on. he came first above all. I did all I could do to make sure that he had the best life I could give him. I made choices that have affected both of our lives tremendously and all in the effort to ensure that he grew up feeling safe and secure.

we have been through a lot him and I. he has had more to deal with in his life time than he should have. he has grown into an incredible young man. he is bright, confident, and the guy that you want on your team. very loyal to his family and friends. funny, creative and grounded. he still has a long way to go and hopefully with one foot in front of the other will make good choices. I am so proud of you baby!

children are with us for a short time and then they are off on their own adventure and dan is gonna have one hell of a life. whatever he decides to do I have told him that he will do it "big". that's just the way he rolls...

and here he is in his most recent shot:



happy birthday baby! enjoy each moment and keep on being you!

recovering...

interesting question, isn't it?

here is were I am, now. recovering and no not in the sick, addiction (although quite possible), accident etc. sort of way.

recovering files, music, addresses and recovering from bouts of tears. lots of tears. my hard drive crashed and I lost buckets. it is not all gone, but what it will take to recover it is time. I don't seem to have a lot of that on my hands lately. I am feeling quite overwhelmed and quite in the mood to take the green garbage bag and start throwing it all away. I mean really. when I sit down and make that ever so helpful list of "things to do" I would like to add "sit on my ass and stare out in space".

I hate to complain as there are far more serious things happening in this world then my big, huge, worthless pity party. I really have nothing to complain about and yet I do. why is that? what is complaining doing for me? is it making things magically disappear. nope, dog still here. oh yeah, sparky the wonder dog avec widest hips in the west went in for more tests today. the doctor said that if everything comes back okay that she will finally accept the fact that sparky is just uniquely shaped and a bit different than the average dog. huh?

I think she just described ME!

in other news mom also made a trip to the doctor's today to find out why nothing has moved forward. no calls from the clinic and no calls from the specialist. cripes!

I had a meltdown last night and decided that I had nothing to eat and never will and will never enjoy the act of eating, EVER! like that was something new? my trip to the doctor's happens next wednesday where hopefully we will be told that I will have to eat like this forever or that I will have to eat like this forever. cause really what is the other option? oh yeah, let's start reintroducing those wonderful foods back into your life and see how it goes...

let me tell you how it goes. you eat good stuff, you get sick, you cry cause you once again want the good stuff and can't have it! in the steps to recovery I think I have finally entered acceptance. okay, partially, but I am starting to think that it is my only choice and so why fight it?

are ya still with me? okay so today was the oh so exciting vet trip, laundry, finish up an exciting project (that I will hopefully share with you tomorrow), and take the homeless man, I mean my son to get a haircut. he does not want one as he thinks he looks amazing with all that hair in his face and down to his knees. kidding, but did ya get that picture in your head or what?

so do you know where you are on your journey? share it with me, k? ciao!