you know how they say bad things come in threes? they say that, don't they? now I am not one to whine, um, okay, maybe I am. so lets recap the threes as I watch my pup try to get his fat ass up on the chair.
#1 - on a day meant for cleaning up the groomer discovers lice in one of the dogs. what can I say about the other dog? he doesn't like the n(l)ice puppy. how do they get it I ask. to which she replies, from other dogs. I say that my dogs don't associate with other dogs. they are snobs. oh no, she says it could happen on a walk. to which I reply, I don't walk my dogs. there, I said it! have you seen the temperature lately? it was cold! Hauling my ass outside for a run was hard enough never mind white foo foo and brown baby. so we medicate, we disinfect, we refrain from petting the puppies and then we give in to cuddling because for the next two things, well, plain and simple, we NEED their cuddles.
#2 - complete my half marathon last Sunday and felt pretty darn good. not a lot of pain like last year and I actually ate something at the brunch rather than stare at it. I think I may have even been bragging about how wonderful I felt. shame on me! the next morning I woke up and felt like I had been hit by a truck! everything ached and I spent most of the next four days glued to the toilet. ahhhh yes, good times.
#3 - "Art Day Monday" and it finally happens at Laurie's studio. we have a fab day. show and tell, gifts, rolodex swap done, tons of pages for the journal swap and her famous puffed wheat squares. could it get any better? I get home and am a little tired as one of the pups had a rough night. I figure I will have a wee nap before everyone comes through the door for dinner. Mom calls to say that Dad is not doing well. Have you met Mom? no? she is a bit of a drama queen and should really have blonde hair. if the attention is not on her she will do whatever it takes to make you focus on her. Dad is feverish, he is shaking, he is spitting up blood. Huh? what is his temperature Mom? I dunno. can he talk? no, he's sleeping. did he eat anything today? ya. has he taken any tylenol? ya. did you want to talk to your Uncle? remember the Uncle who is visiting her from Italy? YES! my uncle gives me the 411 and I rush over to take Dad to emergency. AND here is the kicker. dad gets in the car, uncle gets in the car and mom waves bye to us from the house. Huh? WHATEVER! I ask dad if he can make it or do we need 911. drive he says!
so as I am sitting here this morning it hits me. three things! is it over? cause, really I'm good! god only gives you want you can handle, that which does not kill you makes you stronger, everything happens for a reason.....blah, blah, blah! O - KAY! you have made your point! I am paying attention and to what is it that I need to pay attention to? sorry a bit of ADD, look cows, psycho analyzing happening.
dad is in the hospital and will be for the next week or so. he has pneumonia and they are doing more tests to figure out why he is spitting up blood. scary and new things all around for me. I am an only child and have never had anyone close to me in the hospital for any length of time. doctors, nurses, other patients, needles, poking, tubes, scan, x-ray, bp, heart rate......so many swirls and twirls. it is like being on a ride at the amusement park (and I hate rides) and I just want to get my dad out of there. he has been waiting for a bed for three days. this man who wanted his razor so he could shave, his comb to fix his hair. so concerned about how he looks in the midst of all this ugly chaos. being in the hospital is not pretty. trying hard to keep his normal routine as right now nothing is normal for him. all the countless times he did this for me. kept things as normal as possible and kept me comfortable and kept me talking and laughing in the middle of the mess. so much pressure to be perfect. except this is a different pressure then before. before it was all about approval, praise and attention. now it is about keeping him comfortable, informed and equipped. it isn't about how he thinks of me. besides the issue was never him it was my mother. it is about how I think about him and how much I admire this man. such an amazing and wonderful human being. I am scared and I am trying. I am trying to be calm and be positive for him and for me. I am trying not to kill my mother who didn't get in the car and who brought the remote controls to the hospital last night because they couldn't get the picture, only sound. WTF? trying and yes I WILL handle it and yes it WILL make me stronger and yes it did happen for a reason. I am still trying to uncover that reason as I am sure the doctors are too.
5 comments:
Update: Papa got a room!!
Keep being strong babe. Ti Amo!
You figure it out.....George C.
I never got to tell you that I was so pleased to hear about your half marathon!!!!!
Yay for you and Yay for your Dad finally getting into a room!
Pace yourself sweetie. Its is just the foreplay. Been there and survived and now it is one of my proudest accomplishments. To quote a philosopher...If we didn't have the pain ,. We wouldn't have had the dance. Hugs to Peter.
I hope he's on the mend.
Heard your dad was back at home and feeling much better. Good daughter work sweet girl. Now rest.
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