just let go

here is where I find myself today.  I am learning the art of just letting go.  I am gently easing into it.  let's face it my ideal day hardly ever happens as planned and I need to accept that and be okay with it.  I am better at letting go of what people think about me or what they expect of me.  you get what you get and if you like it you are welcome to hang around and if not I make no apologies for being me.
artful letters used to wrap up a gift
so if I had my ideal day it would look something like this.  wake up to puppy kisses.  head outside for a walk with the dog.  come back and meditate.  do some writing and then hit the mat for yoga.  after taking my vitamins I will whip up a green juice and let it slide down my throat and hit my bloodstream for a shot of goodness.
birthday card for a beautiful niece inspired by francie alberts bredeson
before entering the shower I will dry brush my body.  after a long hot shower where the unwanted body hair magically falls off my body I will dry off and moisturize from head to toe.  brushing and flossing will follow and make up and hair and dressing will be stress free.
some beautiful music or podcast will fill the air with sound as I hit the studio for a morning of play and discovery.  and the day will continue with a glorious lunch.  another walk with the dog,  play date with a friend, cappuccino and cookie for an afternoon break and then the evening starts.  a beautiful colorful meal, no tv, more meditation and writing, a long bath with some reading and then jump into a big comfy bed for a good sleep.

ok, so perhaps I have some lofty ideas about what a perfect day looks like or perhaps it seems to simple for most.  either way somedays the planned out day turns out looking a lot like a pile of pencil shavings as in this picture.
despite the pieces I love the colours!
I was asked the other day if I was under any stress and as the words came out of my mouth I could not believe the truth that came out.  it was as if someone else was speaking for me.  perhaps it was my inner guide or my soul?  I said that I have a list of things that I want to get done, checked off and off my list.  there is no one behind me checking to see if I am getting those things done.  the reality is that many of those things do not matter to anyone else but me.  I am the boss and I am the one putting all the pressure on myself to get things done that I have put on the list.  how twisted is that?  but I remembered it and I have been carrying those words with me.
messages from a magazine
I took some slack off myself.  I missed a day of meditating.  the mat remained rolled up.  I had eggs on toast instead of green juice.  I was enjoying the warm water hitting my skin in the shower when I realized I forgot to dry brush!

and then in a magical moment I just let go.  I told myself it was okay.  that I would continue to move through the day and even smile once or twice.  I would just let it unfold as it will.  I would fire myself as the boss and hire myself as a friend.  my friend would never put that much pressure on me!

speaking of friends I have been inspired by one lately.  she moved her supplies into her dining room so that she would have everything laid out in one place for an online class.  after the online class she started inviting people to come and create at her dining room table.  she shared with me how wonderful she has felt and how much happier she is.  was it the course?  was it the friends?  was it the location?  whatever it was I was happy that she was feeling good and confident and happy.

then a funny thing happened to me.  I moved some of my supplies into the kitchen for a day of sharing and the next day I found myself at the kitchen table.  It just came pouring out of me.  I couldn't stop.  I was smiling.  I felt energetic.  I was happy.  of course I had to share with her what I discovered as I could not believe it myself.

the kitchen table "studio"
was it the location?  was it the friends?  whatever it was or is I am grateful that something inside me stirred and I am just gonna keep going with it.  let it unfold and enjoy the ride. 

and in the meantime and in between time if I happen to walk, meditate, do yoga, drink a green juice, dry brush and end my day with a long bath - awesome!  and if I don't?  AWESOME!  it's all in how we look at it!
letter vortex inspired by joanne sharpe
 AND I am enjoying the view from here!  sending you the strength to let go just a little and smile.
I think I came up with a definition of what I do!


Jenny said...

beautifully written!

Yvonne said...

I'm slowly, VERY slowly, emerging from spending a long stretch with Everybody telling me that being myself will never do, never be enough, and your post is a breath of fresh air that I really needed to read today!
Beautiful artwork and a big chunk of wisdom - thank you!
Your perfect day sounds perfectly peaceful - and I'm holding out for that painless and no-fuss unwanted bodyhair removal-thing ;)