day three

day three became a canvas to use up some left over paint and then I added some stencils of circle dots.  I have been loving circles and specifically mandalas for the last little while.  the addition of an arrow for me symbolizes the need for some direction.  I "know" where I am going geographically but as my new business begins to take shape I wonder about where that is headed.  I need to take some steps towards bringing it to life.  I need to "open that door".  And then came the words "I'm dying to live".  the reality is we are all gonna die.  we have no idea when and so why do we not choose to live while we are alive?

some of us are living the routine instead of living the dream.  we get wrapped up in the day to day and what "should" be done instead of embracing what we "get" to do.  what we get to do is infinite!  we choose what we want to do and how we want to live our lives.  are you being true to your dream?  are you living your life fully?

in june of last year after papa received a clean bill of health we decided to take another trip to italy.  he was excited.  we were excited.  it was awesome to see family and friends and drink the best cappuccinos, see the sites and eat delicious fresh food.  my man and I booked a side trip to florence to celebrate our 20th anniversary.  the weather was not too hot for papa as it had been the year before.  all was good.

then papa came down with bronchial pneumonia and ended up spending two weeks in the hospital.  it was scary.  there was the language barrier which for the most part I can get by but when we are talking medical speak then it gets tricky.  the medications they were giving him and the tests.  it was time to hand it over to god and to trust that the doctors were doing all they could to get him well and back to canada.

meanwhile our trip to florence was cancelled and my man headed back to canada and back to work.  I remained in italy with papa and while I was still there my mother in law took a turn for the worse.  there we were miles away from each other each caring for our sick parent.

papa recovered enough to get him back to canada and after being home for awhile seemed healthier than he had been in awhile.  his appetite was back and he looked healthier too.  my mother in law stabilized as well.  everyone was back in their rightful corners.

with all this whirlwind you would think that all we wanted to do was relax back into our routine and settle in.  hubby got a job offer.  in another province.  six hours away from "our" home.  our "dream" home that we watched come to life.  we had just bought new furniture and I had started hanging pictures on the walls.

deep down I believe that he was probably "dying to live" with all that had happened with his current job.  he wanted a change.  he wanted a fresh start.  he saw opportunities for me too.  and so we spent the next little while tossing the idea back and forth.  change of any sort requires courage.  I have always dreamed of leaving edmonton.  I crave hot climates and sunshine, sand and surf.  he was taking me north.  huh?  what about the plan?  live in this place for five years and then fly south for the rest of our lives?  live on the beach sipping cocktails while the sun kisses our faces.  drag sand into the house, smell the ocean breeze and finally - LIVE!

"We can all be angels to one another. We can choose to obey the still small stirring within, the little whisper that says, 'Go. Ask. Reach out. Be an answer to someone's plea. You have a part to play. Have faith.' We can decide to risk that He is indeed there, watching, caring, cherishing us as we love and accept love. The world will be a better place for it. And wherever they are, the angels will dance."

  --  Joan Wester Anderson


1 comment:

Your man said...

I was lucky enough to have people doing the caring and I was able to spend some quality time with mom. Of course not alone, but I got to say see you later.