away we go!

back to the beach for this girl.  I love to travel - I do.  although this trip was agreed to with much reserve.  I wasn't sure if it felt right.  so much happened this year and who am I to be whisked away to the beautiful ocean?

travelling art kit
worries about my dad and how we will handle christmas this year without my mom.  it is kurjata christmas which means we will be trekking north to be with the big huge wonderful family.  it will be wonderful to see everyone again.  to see their smiles, the new babies and to comfort each other with all that we have been through and are going through this year.

pencils, scissors, tape etc.
so this get away had me on edge.  worried.  angry.  sleepless nights and nights filled with weird dreams.   dreams of dead people and scary dreams.  planning parties, workshops and appointments for when I get back.  I am still battling whatever this cough thing is that got a hold of me in september and has set up house in my system.  being sick does not help to build excitement.

assortment of paints and mediums
as I packed I kept telling myself that this would be a time to slow down.  no rushing around.  take your time.   I plan to sit still and quiet my mind.  I plan to listen to the ocean and let it sing its song to me.  I plan to write.  write and write and write and get all of this junk out of my head and onto the page.  with the sun kissing my skin and the sand tickling my toes I am gonna let myself go and let go.

all packed up and ready!
 with all the slowing down this girl had to bring along the stuff that makes her happy.  my art supplies!  I have it down to a science when it comes to packing light and still having enough stuff to let myself create everyday as I say.  
journals, reading, inspiration
I have some good audio books to keep my going while my fingers are busy.  we have some natalie goldberg (of course!), anne lamott (could listen to her over and over and have!), pema chodron, debbie ford, marianne williamson, deepak chopra, danielle laporte (she has a new one coming out soon btw!), brene brown and annie dillard.

to read I grabbed "old friend from far away" by natalie goldberg.  it has some great prompts in it and I just love this woman!  "the places that scare you" by pema chodron (recommend by linda - thanks girl!) and "poemcrazy" by susan wooldridge (more writing!).

with plan in place I keep telling myself to stop planning!  ha ha!  it is such a merry go round in my head right now.  which way to turn or just throw in the towel.  so many thoughts and questions fill my head and I am aching for some answers and some direction.  let's keep that in mind as we let go - shall we?

I know it may sound silly to think that I can go away and transform in a week.  I know it could happen just as well here.  I know that you might be saying to yourself - she is going to the beach and sit still?  what about the tours and all that there is to see?  oh not to worry.  I will be partaking in a few sights, sounds and tasty treats and ice cold drinks but I want to savour it.  I want it to fill me up and I want to fold it up and put it in my pocket so that when I get back I can pull it out as a reminder.

I am not expecting a grand epiphany or anything but I do NEED to calm down, sit still and inhale some good air.  I am a junkie for the ocean.  the combination of the water, the sun and the sand just makes me feel whole.  I always say that the stork dropped me off in the wrong continent!

be well and much gratitude for all of your kind words and suggestions.  it warms my heart to know that I am not alone and we have all been there or are there now.  you matter!  you are loved!  peace

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