beware of "nadia"

seriously! I should be wearing a sign.

mom wanted to have some friends over for lunch and so I made it happen. pulled one of my pre made lasagnas out of the freezer, tossed a salad, a few buns and bingo "lunch". she had a couple of the nasty cream pies (sorry mccains!) and bingo "dessert".

while we are waiting dad is going on and on about he can't cook and how can we do this and what a pain in the ass and so on and so forth. I threw him a towel to cry in and told him to sit down and let me handle the preparation. eventually he sat down and relaxed a bit. he is not really the social type and so I knew he was nervous about that too.

so our guests arrive and basically my job is to make sure that my dad sits and relaxes and has a good time. mom was easy as she is not really able to help anyway and she was content visiting. I serve and sit down to enjoy lunch. and the conversation begins and of course I want to contribute cause heck I am present! it would seem weird if I didn't say something now and then, right? yup, well. we got to this one part and it went something like this:

guest: you are no longer allowed to have communion by mouth anymore because of H1N1.

me: really? interesting.

guest: oh yes! and they have taken away the holy water. oh those poor people were tapping that bowl on sunday. I finally flipped it over.

me: hmmm... ya know, if someone wanted to make a buck they could come up with individual holy waters.

guest: (nothing. crickets)

OH YEAH! I said it OUT LOUD! to people who I really do not know! cripes! I looked at my mom who was knee deep in lasagna and asked her if she would like some more. I turned to dad and asked if he would like more bread. good lord! sorry lord! someone SAVE ME!

then they started saying how wonderful it was to be together and visit. whew!

BUT! c'mon! is it not a wonderful idea? my friend seems to think that we would have to clear it with the pope, but I'm saying we start production of units immediately so that we can have them in place before christmas. are ya in?

and about dad? he didn't stop talking the whole time they were there! hmph! for someone who does not like to socialize he sure had a few things to say. I realized that he too needs to have some social time with other people.

the time away has done wonders for clearing my head and figuring out some strategies and things to investigate for them both. time away from the "eye of the storm" was just what I needed. now if I can just get a filter on my mouth that would be super! amen!

back to reality...

saturday we had melissa's and I am still coming down from the high. the plan was to walk. the plan changed. see when you take two people who have not run a lick since last december. two people who have had enough crap thrown at them to fill a small village. two people who have been so wound up from stress.

well, you end up with two people who are ready to spontaneously combust! and so we decided in our brief moment of insanity that we were gonna run and run we did. I swear that no one could have removed the smiles from our faces. I am sure people thought we were on drugs and we kind of were. you see we both love to run. we love the outdoors and we were running the mountains people! talk about beautiful!

would we recommend not training for a 10 km and then taking off in a sprint? absolutely not! we were sore and thankfully we know the recovery tricks and so we are fairing pretty well. and as far as insane? oh yeah! we are already talking about our next race.

do one thing a day that scares you...


today was a day of first's for michael. although I don't think even he could have imagined the adventure that lay ahead of him. coupled with my eek's and ahhh's and sobbing I am sure he had a better time in mind.

we went on the gondola ride

and he giggled like a little girl while I squealed like a pig. I was terrified, but I did it for him. I knew he would really enjoy it and that he did. he took some awesome pictures from the observation deck and me? well, I stuck close to the wall so my pictures are less than awesome.

and if that wasn't enough he also tasted his first bubble tea

and I giggled like a little girl when he slurped up his first bubble. good times...

excuse me "deer"...

yup, we are in deer country. aka bear country, elk country, moose country and well just absolutely beautiful country.

I love the mountains. love the fresh air, love the scenery and there is nothing like sitting outside and having lunch right smack in the middle of it all. yum!

spent the day walking around soaking in the sights and the beautiful sunshine. is it really the end of september? c'mon! tonight we decided to see this. very good!

and NOW? tub time!

a lot can happen in 15 minutes...

just checked in to the hotel.

they have a little gift bag for me. WTH? bath salts, a loofah, bath gel, make up remover pads, q-tips and a cotton pad. I'm calling it a "whore" bag. momma please forgive me, but that is the first thing that came to mind.

so we get to our room and are settling in. settling in to me means taking your pants off and chilling out. so there I am in my panties when I hear a knock on the door. "housekeeping!" WTH? I jump to get my pants back on as they walk right in and hand over a couple of chocolate chip cookies. WTH? which again I think of "whore" snacks?

laurie and I stayed at this hotel before and I don't remember the gift bag or the cookies. which leads me to believe that when I was in the shower she ate the cookies and hid the gift bag. that WHORE!

not sure what is going to happen next so I am keeping my pants on. ciao!

everything if fine, really...

honestly, I not have drinking been.

joey with his bandage

I feel the need to start out this post with that statement. mostly for me so that I reaffirm to myself that everything IS fine. sober or otherwise.

in other words...


let's wrap up the week, shall we?

this week was beautiful as far as the weather goes. I really wish I had spent more time laying outside in the sun, but hey.

the week started out fair with a wonderful walk in the river valley and art with a friend.

and my mother having two falls. one while holding a pot of hot oil. oh lord! her forearms and knees are now bandaged and she is not allowed to cook anymore. big sigh.

took the dogs for a grooming and was gobsmacked at the bill. I was told that if they participated in the "pampered pet" program that they would pay a reduce rate. perfect! how does that work? you bring your pets in every six weeks. are you fucking kidding me? I don't even get pampered every six weeks. b - bye!

that same day I am feeling sick because I figure that cheese can only hurt me - sometimes. yeah, okay - ALL THE TIME! so in my cheese hangover I take "little joe" to school where we both fail miserably. he does not care that I have every treat under the sun. nor does he care to acknowledge me when I call his name or swear at him. nothing! crickets!

so wednesday I pick myself up, dust myself off and head out for my wednesday morning habit. everything goes well. everyone listens to me whine and reassures me that I am normal and so is joey.

normal? the afternoon is spent at the vet where joey gets his blood taken to check some wonky stuff they found last month. he freaks out not at the needle, but as the alcohol hit his paw. grow up! so he gets a blue bandage for being a brave pup. sparky gets checked to see if there is any help we can get him for his aching body. so two blood tests and $100.00 later we find out that sparky will need an ultra sound ($400.00) to find out more information. joey could also use an ultrasound ($400.00 more) , but because he is so young and not exhibiting any signs of distress we are going to let him go and check him again in four months.

thursday morning I wake up with determination to knock off some items of the ever ending list. window washing, house cleaning, purge unused items etc. day is flying along and much progress is being made with many cross outs on the list. yay! call from dad to say that someone (who?) is coming tomorrow to see mom at 1:00 pm.

friday morning I continue with the cleaning before I run off to mom and dad's where shortly after my arrival a nurse comes and announces that she is mom's nurse. huh? homecare. wha? she will be coming in three times a week. seriously? we are asked many questions. house tour and before I rush off to my appointment we have organized respite for dad and are getting information about subsidized cleaning. WHAT THE HELL?


whoa, back up nelly! a few months ago I was quite confused as to who I was speaking to and who was coming out to see us and after many phone calls I was still confused. we had someone come out to do a equipment assessment and I thought that was it. I made more phone calls and was ratted out to a social worker. honestly after that I was afraid to make any more phone calls. I am also a bit timid when it comes to answering the door. I am thinking at any moment that they will come to take me and lock me up. for what I am not certain.

here is the thing. the thing is that I am welcoming the locking up. honestly and I am being honest with you now. I could really use a little break!

so let's summarize. ma is good, dad is good, pups are stable and I am packed and ready to go! CHEERS!

have you seen this?



*1846: Elias Howe patents the first practical sewing machine and threads his way into the fabric of history.

*2009: hearing people comment on the leaves changing color. shut up people! I recognize that they are pretty and I am all in with feeling the leaves crunch under my feet, but whoa! let me enjoy the rest of my sunshine filled days in peace!

already I am wincing at the thought of "falling back". pfftt! I say! and therefore am already checking out beaches to escape to. yes, I realize that I already escaped to the beach once this year, but have you seen my year? yeah! me, sun, sand beneath my toes and the sound of the surf is my sanctuary.

speaking of beautiful sounds...

dan & jille had a little gig before they left for their cross canada adventure and it was awesome. the opening act for the evening was a local musician. the name of the band is "dear (your name here)"

you can find them on i-tunes too. I am loving their "a speck of white" album right now. go support a local!

missing dan playing his guitar and singing...

note to self (aka dumb ASS!)

1. do not talk to the next door neighbor who hates dogs about how much you still miss max.

2. do not watch "oprah's viewers favorites" when you are seconds away from your monthly gift.

both of these left me in a puddle of tears.

now on to the good things about 09/09/09:

I went for a long walk with joey to simmer down after the neighbors comments about max upset me. during our walk I was practicing some commands that we learned at puppy school and this man came over and sat down beside us. my first thought was "oh god, please do not light a cigarette or I may die or ask you for one".

he sat down and admired joey and started to tell me about how he had to let his "best friend" go in march. me too! "she had cancer" he said. mine too! he went on "oh they are wonderful creatures who are always there and who love us no matter what". "I miss her every day" he said. we talked some more and off he went. the whole time I was thinking that this was one of those moments when that lady from "touched by an angel" came to send me an angel to remind me that there are good things and to focus on those when I feel down and defeated.

then I get back home and felt better for a bit. then I watched oprah and then the tears started again.

then another bright reminder of good things. I received a phone call from a lady that mom used to work for and she was asking how mom was and what the diagnosis was and how we were coping. she had just called mom to ask her out to lunch on friday with her and a few other of mom's past clients. I thanked her very much for taking time to pick mom up for a "ladies lunch" and told her how much mom loved going out with the girls. reminded her how dad and I are not really the social type and how mom is. of course she knows this and loves mom to pieces and misses her so much. she ended the conversation with "if there is ever anything you need, ever! please do not hesitate to call me. I will drop everything and be there for you".

wow! more tears, but good ones!

so in light of 09/09/09 we shed some tears, talked to some very kind people and got our monthly gift.

I would say that was cause for celebration so I have good coffee in hand and a cake baking in the oven.

just missing my boy(s), I guess....

how was your 09/09/09?

today's ten beautiful things...

-my ten-

inspired by rachel:

1. my son's voice (thank god for rogers fave five!)

2. good chai lattes
3. cozy sweaters
4. cameras with built in video
5. great pens
6. comfy sandals
7. new underwear
8. a kewl purse in a beautiful color
9. a husband who cooks! (and leftovers!)
10. puppy snuggles and kisses

what are your ten beautiful things for today?